Tuesday 31 August 2010

Hollywood Babble On & On #586: BATTLES! BATTLES! BATTLES!

Welcome to the show folks....

YOU KNOW HOMER, I THINK SOMEBODY ALREADY DID A MOVIE ABOUT WW2.

Two big budget World War 2 movies are reportedly in development. One is a 3D retelling of the Battle Of Midway, and the other project is a Hollywood/China co-production about the Flying Tigers to be directed by action-meister John Woo to be shot in IMAX.

For those who don't know their history, the Battle of Midway was a huge air and naval battle between the USA and Japan over a tiny but strategically crucial island in the center of the Pacific called, naturally, Midway. It marked two major developments in military history. It destroyed Japan's brief period of naval supremacy, and it showed that aircraft carriers, and the planes they carried were more strategically valuable than the more traditional battleships.

It was also a story of cracked codes, and a simple yet brilliant deception operation that completely exposed Japanese war plans. And if you like your movie history, legendary director John Ford was actually on the island itself, and was wounded while filming the battle.

Before America's entry into WW2 The Flying Tigers were officially a unit of mercenaries working for China's Nationalist government fighting the Japanese. Unofficially they had a nod and a wink approval for their actions from the American government. A connection this story has to film history is that the Flying Tigers' executive officer was Merian C. Cooper, the producer/creator of
King Kong and other films.

Personally, I like a well done WW2 story. Everything from attempts to recreate specific historical events, to blatantly fictional action-adventures. So I have to say that I wish them luck.

BITCHES BATTLE FOR BITCHES

Three major broadcast networks are vying for
producer Darren Starr's latest concoction. It's a soap opera set in the upscale suburbs of Dallas and is based on a novel called... wait for it.... Good Christian Bitches.

Now I'm only mildly psychic, but I'm willing to bet dinars to donuts that whatever network wins the bidding battle the winner will want a name change.

Why?

I don't think 3/4+ of the population of the USA will be too keen on that title. Aside from the minority that will write angry letters, and the even smaller minority of that minority that will utter threats over it, the majority of people who would take offense at the name will simply flip the channel to find something that doesn't piss on them from the rarefied heights of Beverly Hills.

My suggestion for a new title:


AN EMBARRASSMENT OF BITCHES

You see, it rhymes with
An Embarrassment of Riches, but includes the whole 'bitch' meme they seem to be going for.

However, if you use it, you're going to have to pay. Not just for the title, but for saving your bacon.

LIONSGATE VS CARL ICAHN ROUND 500

Carl Icahn has upped his offer to buy Lionsgate to $7.50 a share, but only if they stop the stock for debt dilution scheme with his former
apprentice Mark Rachesky. Some think the recent success of The Expendables and The Last Exorcism will help Lionsgate management fight Icahn.

It might, and it might not. The Expendables is doing pretty well, but it cost $82 million to make, and probably that much for prints and advertising. So while the $100 million box office take is nice, Hollywood "loses" money on $1 billion movies. Kick-Ass is having a decent second life on DVD, but is it enough to mitigate its dismal turn at the box office? Their best money-maker is The Last Exorcism which was the sort of low budget genre acquisition that used to be the company's bread and butter, which Icahn wants to go back to, and let's not forget the fortune lost by Lionsgate's intended summer tent-pole movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith Knight & Day Killers.

This fight is not over.

1 comment:

  1. je pressman1/9/10 4:20 am

    A WWII film on Midway is a good dea and somewhere on the cinema internet there was amention that the film would be in that novel newfangled 3D.Is this true?In this new version,so as to appeal to the niche vampire market,Pattinson will be cast as a vampire sea-fighting Commodore.Johnny Depp will be the exotic reformed pirate with a grudge against the Japanese military.The love interest will be Zack Efron and of course the always perky Taylor Lautner.Land ahoy!

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